Cooperative games are games in which players need to work together in order to win the game. One of the simplest examples of a cooperative game is working together to keep a balloon in the air. The experience of doing this as a family or as a team means that you tend to experience the same emotions at the same time, which fosters empathy and connection. You all celebrate when you manage to keep the balloon in the air for a long time, you all feel fearful when the balloon precariously enters a small corner in the room, and you collectively breathe a sigh of relief when someone manages to reach it and hit it into the air again. Throughout this you are likely to experience what others are experiencing and this joint experience connects you and fosters empathy. In addition, you also need to manage the highs and lows of the game and the balloon rises and falls, regulating as you experience the emotions that go along with this in order to be able to continue playing. And yet, the collective experience of being responsible for the outcome of the game tends to reduce some of the emotion you can experience in this context.
For children who are learning to regulate their emotions, game play like this, with shared emotions and an absence of competition, is often a good first step towards being able to manage competitive games. It can be a great opportunity to practice regulation and provides lots of opportunities for direct and indirect teaching. There are a number of cooperative board games that can be purchased. One of the games I particularly enjoy is Hoot, Owl, Hoot in which all players have to work together to get all the owls back to their nest before the sun comes up. Race to the Treasure is similar and both are made by Peaceable Kingdom.
In this article I’ll briefly discuss these aspects of using cooperative games further along with some thoughts about therapeutic use.
Cooperative games are one of the tools I draw on when I have a family who are struggling to connect or when working with siblings. The games tend to be non-threatening and allow family members to have a positive experience of playing together. Noticing and naming emotions tends to come more easily when all family members are having a similar experience so cooperative games can be an opportunity to practice these skills. Game play tends to elicit feelings in a predictable manner, such as excitement as you come close to winning or fear or worry as the outcome of the game is in doubt, making it simpler for grown ups to tentatively name their children’s feelings if they are less familiar with doing so.
The nature of cooperative games, with everyone needing to work together to win, also encourages collaboration and shared problem solving. Often by the time families come to therapy relationships have become fraught and strained and working together as they play a cooperative game can give you insight into the resources a family might have, enabling you to help the family extend these skills to the presenting concerns at a later point. Collaboration and problem solving skills can also be learnt through games like this, with our role as therapists often being to facilitate this and ensure that all family members are included.
Game play naturally provides a variety of emotions that can be useful for helping to build a child’s emotional awareness and regulation skills. For some children however the competitive nature of games can make this too challenging initially and losing a game or not having something go their way in a game may lead to them becoming very dysregulated.
Cooperative games provide a way to titrate the emotions that arise during play: sharing the emotions makes them less intense and provides the therapist with a good opportunity to model emotional awareness and regulation in real time. Naming that you feel worried about turning a card over offers the child an opportunity to recognise that they might be feeling similarly and taking a breath before doing so allows you to indirectly teach an emotional regulation technique. Children usually find these games engaging and interesting so they are an ideal therapeutic medium.
Card and board games are a wonderful resource in therapy with children, with cooperative games being particularly useful for building connection and developing emotional awareness and regulation.
If you are interested in learning more about using games in therapy check out our vlog in which Suzanne and I each share one of our favourite games here.
You may also like to complete our short online course around using board and card game therapeutically, which is full of great ideas around using games in therapy and comes with a free ebook. Further details are available here.
Dr Fiona Zandt, Clinical Psychologist
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Our shared resources and posts are aimed at providing ideas for qualified professionals and are not a substitute for appropriate training and ongoing supervision.